Dog Tired

We’ve had a lot going on lately.  Some I’ve shared on the blog or Instagram.  I’m lacking mojo and honestly just exhausted.  There are some days I wish I could stay at home with Connor and have a normal routine, exercise, cook dinner, read books…without having to worry about time or money.  I know God is in control of everything and He knows the desires of our hearts.

I recently changed jobs (same company).  I’m working longer hours now.  I love my job and wouldn’t change it for the world, but this week every day I’ve been dead dog tired?  What gives?  I’m trying to eat better and exercise weather permitting.  Terence has a 2 hour commute every day, so he’s also tired and exhausted at the end of each day.  I cook dinner, do laundry, and dishes…..after that I am wiped!  I know this year is going to be full of changes and struggles.  My mind is constantly reeling.  Do you ever have a problem just shutting down your brain?

I don’t want to be that Mom that’s so tired at the end of the day that all I can muster is a frozen pizza in the oven and Connor is stuck in front of the TV the rest of the night just so we can relax.  But I am sorry to admit that’s the way it’s been lately.  We play soccer or read a book.  But somehow I feel like that’s not enough and I’m only giving 75% of what I should be.  Finding balance is hard and there is no magic key to happiness.

Do any of you struggle with these things?  I know I’m going on and on about feeling guilty.  How do you find happiness and contentment in the everyday when you wish things were different?

Our little #selfieaday moments and morning rides in the car is something I cherish.  Connor actually asks to do the selfies.  If I forget he reminds me 🙂  It’s become a memory and is special to him.

So, even if we just have our few special moments together each day it means more to me than anything in the world.  I know I’m lacking a lot in this role of motherhood…but all of that said….it’s the best thing I’ve ever done in my life.

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About thejavamama

I am a 30-ish year old wife, mom, photography lover, & coffee junkie. I’m from Arkansas, but currently live in Fort Worth, Texas. I am a twin. I work full time & live for the weekends…sometimes it’s hard to manage it all, but with God I can do anything! This blog is my scrapbook through life & a way to keep in touch with family & friends.

2 Responses to Dog Tired

  1. Lindsey says:

    Oh girl. I don’t even work outside of the home and this is how I feel at the end (and sometimes the middle!) of the day, so I can only imagine how you feel when you work a full time job and work being a momma too!

    Sometimes it’s hard to just find balance and be OK with things not all being perfect. I’ve had to really let go of wanting to always have clean dishes and sinks and bathrooms and realize that at the end of the day, what matters most is my people and my mental health. HUGS to you and hope that you’re able to find some rest and normalcy soon!
    Lindsey recently posted…A Taste of Spring.My Profile

  2. April says:

    Oh honey, you’re doing great at this motherhood thing! Connor is sweet and so wonderful. I stay at home and I STILL struggle with these things! I think we all go through tired times and we find ourselves going through the motions until we can muster enough energy to do more. You’re an awesome mama and I can see how much you love him! You’re not alone. Love you!
    April recently posted…When all you need is a break.My Profile

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