I am home sick today. I have a dr appt at 2:30 and it can’t come soon enough! I got that shot of progesterone last tuesday and I quit bleeding for four days, and then all of the sudden it hit me like a bolt of lightening again. I went through an entire 24 count package of pads yesterday and the bleeding still hasn’t stopped. Terence almost took me to the emergency room last night, but I decided to wait until today because I knew all I would do is wait there and they would just give me another shot. I’m so tired of being tired and I feel like someone just took my uterus and squeezed it like an orange!
A little history:
My Papa’s mother died of a blood hemorrage. My sister was in the hospital a couple years ago from bleeding so bad she had countless blood transfusions to replace all the blood she lost. Poor sister! We both have never had a normal period, our mother didn’t either. God is stronger and blessed my mother with twins though 🙂 And no, she had no “help” getting pregnant with drugs and such. We have both been to blood doctors and they find nothing wrong..which is frustrating! They keep saying we won’t have trouble getting pregnant but I know we’ve both been trying for awhile with no luck 🙁 And they tell us we don’t ovulate and just want to put us on drugs….
I hope this doctor today doesn’t just send me home with a shot and an excuse that everything will be okay, because it just isn’t anymore!!!!
As I was praying last night pleading with God to take away this pain, I feel like He was saying something to me. I suddenly felt so selfish. Selfishness like I have never felt before! I have this wonderful LIFE!!! God has allowed me to live, here on this earth. I have a wonderful husband, and great family, everything to be happy and content with. Why do I always worry so much about stuff I can’t control? God is in control, I am not. If He wills for me to have a child that is wonderful, and that is what HE wants for me. Take nothing for granted, we aren’t promised tomorrow and I want to feel like this life I am living is worth something more than I think it should be, but I want to be content with what God wants it to be so that I can glorify HIM!